Sometimes being with my Mom is like being in that movie Groundhog Day. Remember the one, when Bill Murray keeps living the same day over and over and over.
My Mom's short term memory is - ok, I'll just say it - it's shot. As a result, she often repeats things only a short time after she just said them.
Over Thanksgiving, I was kicking back watching Survivor (die hard fan) with my Mom and my husband - who graciously pretends that he still enjoys the show, just for my benefit. If that's not love, I don't know what is. He even adds commentary, and throws out the occasional "who are they going to vote off tonight" theories. I know he's just making it up.
Anyway, we're watching the show, and my Mom says "I didn't know this show was still on!". Then, about 5 minutes later, she says "I didn't know this show was still on!". Same inflection and everything.
We started cracking up, and told her that she had just said that. I then told her that she often does that, and did she realize that she called my sister twice yesterday and had the same conversation with her both times.
Then, about three minutes later, she says "I didn't know this show was still on!". And she was not kidding. She ended up saying that two more times before the show was over. I know, because we counted.
It was seriously like Groundhog Day.
I know this is actually a serious aspect of growing old, and it's actually a sad topic. But if I don't laugh about it, I will cry. So, I choose to laugh. And thankfully, so does my Mom. I love her.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
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4 comments:
I agree - you do have to laugh.
Totally different - but my mother has battled cancer twice over the past couple of years and actually became addicted to oxycontin at one point. And by that I mean that her body became addicted and it began to affect her personality - she wasn't popping extra pills or anything. Anyway - she became incredibly paranoid and would worry about ca-razy things. I had to prove to her that it would be impossible for my toddlers to pull the oven onto themselves (something she saw on the Today show or something). Bizarre things like that. Of course she's not addicted anymore. Once it was discovered that she needed to stop taking it, she cut back until she could be off of it completely. But as a result, she had to go through similar symptoms that druggies do when they're in rehab. Oh - and I've never even seen my mother drunk - so the whole idea of her being addicted to drugs is just outrageous.
So the whole point of all of that background was that it was not a fun time and pretty scary at times, but we have to find humor in it. My brother talks about getting her off the "junk." And we always remind her about the crazy talk. We have to laugh you know?
Similar stuff going on here. Kirsten and I have always sort of agreed that our moms are on parallel paths. My mom left four messages for me, all before noon, today then stopped by my house and left three notes, one of which said, and I'm not kidding, "exercise the dog by throwing the tennis ball into the backyard 12 times every 2 hours." OMG. as we wait for a cancer verdict, i'm with you on the laughter. i'm sure i'd miss all those notes and messages.
I used to see my grandmother every weekend. All the nearby family would meet up there on a Sunday.
We used to say we were allowed to laugh at some of the things she said, but only because we were family.
It's hard to know a loved one is not doing as well as we would like, but keeping a sense of humor about it all can really help.
I love Kate's comment. That is so funny and so sad at the same time. I could write "mom" stories for about a month and not run out of material. At least she can laugh at herself.
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