Ok, I know what you are thinking... when the hell is Kari going to write a post other than Thankful Thursday? Hey...at least I'm trying to stay thankful, right?
My excuse can be summed up in one word - overwhelmed.
I remember back in April (which seems like just yesterday), my friend Marisa asked me if we could get together one weekend in May. I checked out my calendar, and realized that we already had at least one thing going on every single weekend day throughout the month of May. Many days we were double or triple booked, not to mention that every weekday had at least one or two evening activities we had to attend. My reaction was, holy crap, we have absolutely no free time in May. My reaction should have been HOLY CRAP, we have absolutely NO free time in May, I better figure out how to skim some of this down so we (I) can stay sane!
To make things even more fun, life in general outside of all of these activities, has been c r a z y. Work is insane these days. I work in the financial industry. Enough said. Things around my firm are more than uncertain, and everyone is varying degrees of wigged out. We're supposed to learn more about our fate sometime in mid-June. Until then, everyone is waiting. Not fun. Not fun at all. On the home front, it's not a whole lot easier. My sweet little Milly, as I talked about in a recent post, somehow turned thirteen on her third birthday and I'm pretty sure she thinks she's ready to move out of the house - which would actually be just fine with me at this point. Or, if maybe she could at least go out and get a job if I end up losing mine, that would be great. We've been struggling with some "daytime wetness" issues with Seesa, or at least that's the term they use at the Urology Clinic we've finally ended up at to figure all of this out. My marriage is...well, hanging on by a thread at this point. I'm so overwhelmed that I've been letting things get to me that are completely removed from my own life - like the fate of Jon and Kate plus 8. Why the heck am I so upset about their situation? Seriously, there's no doubt that I have no idea what the real story is, because it's all being spun by TLC and the media. Maybe it just gives me something to worry about, other than my own worries.
So, what exactly am I thankful for, you ask? Good question. I'm actually Thankful Anyway. I discovered the Thankful Anyway Thursday post on Holistic Mama's blog. She says, "it's easy to be thankful for the good stuff, can you be thankful for the not so good?"
I'm thankful anyway because I have a job right now, which is more than a lot of people can say these days.
I'm thankful anyway because Milly is coming into herself in her third year of life, and challenging me to teach her how to turn her defiance into self confidence and self reliance.
I'm thankful anyway because Seesa is excited and willing to do the things that the doctors have told us will help her.
I'm thankful anyway because what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. I have faith and I'm certain that if we can work through our struggles, it will make our marriage stronger.
My friend Lisa sent me an email recently called, "Just do the next thing...". It was about an overwhelmed Mom who heard someone speak about the simple concept of doing the next thing. When her emotions would start to run away with her, she would simply ask herself what the next thing she needed to do was. And then she would do it. And then she would do the next thing, and the next, and the next. And all those little "next things" got her through the most overwhelming days.
So, I'm going to be just doing the next thing, while I get though this month and the next, and one of those next things will be writing in my blog - because I miss it, and I miss connecting with all of you.