Unanswered Prayers

I dated the same guy for most of my High School and early college years. Ok, so we weren't actually dating continuously the entire time. We'd break up and be apart for a while, until I convinced him we should get back together. Yes, you could say I was obsessed.

I was very involved with his family, went on vacations with them, and even worked for his Mom for a while. I spent so much time with him, that I would often abandon my own family and friends, something that I look back on with regret. I was totally faithful to him when we were together as well, something I look back on with regret... Not really, but I do think that being as young as we were, I should have dated a LOT more back then. Needless to say, I had visions of us ending up happily married, with a few kids.

After a couple years of college and being on my own, I started to mature and experience life. By the time we broke up for the last time, it was mutual and I knew it was for good. I was ready to move on, although I always wondered if I was making the right decision. Was I letting go of something that was "meant to be"?

Over the years, we've kept in touch with each other, periodically catching up on each other's lives. We are both married, both have two kids and a good life. Recently though, he's gotten really off track in his life. He's unhappy in his marriage, and is involved with other women. He's basically skating on thin ice, and I can see him plunging into the cold soon if he doesn't figure things out.

You know that saying, "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers"?

I hope that I can somehow impart to my daughters how precious it is to spend time early in your life, creating yourself, and not getting wrapped up in who other people think you should be. Looking back, while I think I shouldn't have let this relationship be the primary focus of such an emerging time in my life, I learned a lot and I am happy that he was my first love. I'm also happy that he wasn't my last love.

Sleep Talking

Milly, my littlest, talks in her sleep a lot.

Last night, it seems she was actually walking in her sleep. She came out of her room and down the hall, calling for her sister, Seesa.

When I found her and took her back to her bed, she said to me, "I yuv deers. They make me so happy."

Hmm. Deers. I guess they make me pretty happy too.

You can comment anonymously now!!!

Ok, I know at least a couple of my friends are reading this thing... but I was surprised that I wasn't getting more comments, especially from some of my more outspoken friends - ahem, you know who you are.

Then, I realized that I didn't have my settings enabled for anonymous comments. (I'm still new at this whole blogging thing.) Problem solved! You are all free to comment away now.

You know you're old when...

Your babysitter has never heard of the movie "Flashdance". What the...? Really?!?!

I was just discussing this with my friend "A" tonight, and we decided that we are SO glad that we got to grow up in the 80's. Really, there is nothing cooler.

Who wouldn't love a generation that invented baggy off the shoulder sweatshirts and leg warmers?

First Day of Preschool

Today was my littlest, Milly's first day of Preschool, or "big girl school" as she refers to it. Her older sister is an old hat now, being that this is her second year.

It was Sessa's idea to pose by the pot of flowers behind the door of the Preschool...my little Spielberg. Whatever gets them to smile.


After dinner tonight, we had pink milk to celebrate.




I have to say, I celebrated a bit too. It's nice to have one more year, before Seesa officially starts Kindergarten. Then, maybe I'll have to change my blog name to "I left my heart at elementary school"...? Or maybe, "I left one of my hearts at preschool, and the other at elementary school..."? I jest.

Yes, I am aware that my children are starting to look like "Cousin It". I'm attempting to grow their bangs out. Any tips on how to keep it out of their faces with something that will actually stay in their hair for longer than 20 minutes?

Conversation with my 4 year old

Me: Seesa, want a penny to throw into that fountain, and make a wish?

Seesa: Sure Mommy.

(Seesa comes back with penny in hand.)

Me: Don't you want to make a wish?

Seesa: I wish to keep my penny.

Seesa's Daddy: Oh Yeah, baby!

Best Laid Plans

So, our wonderful lake vacation has come to an end, and we were heading home on Friday. Only thing was - we couldn't go home, because we needed to stay out of our house until Saturday afternoon because of our construction.

No worries, we decided to visit my best girlfriend, L and her family on our way home and stay the night. Here's a picture of L, me and our kids from last year around this same time.

L and I met in college, as dorm-mates. We hit it off right away, and were basically inseparable for the rest of our college days together. Even though we ended up living in different places after college, we've remained attached at the heart. We have one of those friendships where anytime we talk to each other, no matter how much time has passed, we pick up like we last spoke only a few hours earlier. We've been through so much together. We were both married within a couple years of one another, and have had the joy of having our children around the same time too. In fact, our first daughters are less than a month apart in age. Our second daughters are only five months apart. I swear, we didn't even plan it! We aren't the kind of chicks who have to do everything together, even pee. We have a connection, through Christ, and it's kept us together. I was looking forward to my "L fix".

Only thing was, she was working until 5pm, so we needed to kill time after our 10am check-out. We were doing a fine job of it in the beginning, with a trip to the ice cream parlor at Bass Lake after lunch. Things started to take a turn for the worst after we got in the camper to head out to her neck of the woods. The air conditioning stopped working... and it was around 108 degrees that day.

We decided to try to grab a movie in a town along the way, so I used my handy dandy Blackberry to find a kid's show. By the time we got to the theatre, the kids hadn't napped, so they were c r a n k y. Could it have been the fact that they were hopped up on sugar just before loading them up for hours in the car, with no AC? This was exacerbated by the fact that my husband was at his wit's end. Could it have been the fact that the kids were hopped up on sugar and driving him nuts while he was trying to drive our fully loaded camper, with no AC?

Walking up to the ticket counter with two crying kids in tow, we discovered that the kid's movie was not in fact playing at that theatre (the only one in town) anymore. Back across the 110 degree parking lot with two crying kids, into the camper - did I mention, with no AC?

After a not-so-pleasant conversation between my husband and I, which involved discussions of sleep deprived kids, out of patience parents, needs to have discussion with contractor before husband leaves for another week-long business trip on Sunday... we decided to just head for home, and bypass our visit with my friend L.

Back on the (not-so-handy-dandy) Blackberry, to search out a hotel for the night. Eventually, we landed in our home town. The hotel was great, despite our continued personal woes, probably due to all of our exhaustion and lack of brain cells after our drive in the oven. We argued about where to eat - I wanted to make it easy, and just eat at the hotel, and my husband insisted that hotel food sucks, and we were in our hometown after all - we could find a better place to eat. I acquiesced, and he proceeded to drive us to... McDonald's. Yes, this is his idea of food that is better than hotel food.

We are now home, and have spent the rest of the weekend trying to get the house back in order from all the disarray of the construction, on top of unpacking from our lake vacation. So much for being rested.

L - I MISS YOU, and wish we could have seen each other. But, as I know you'd want me to do, let me look in the bright side here.

1. I just had a fantastic vacation with my sister and her family, at an idyllic location, creating memories for ourselves and our children that will last a lifetime.
2. The fact that L understood why we didn't make it, without a shred of animosity, is a shining example of our amazing friendship.
3. I heard that WALL-E isn't worth seeing in the theatre anyway.